


o house of unquenchable fire

by Nibelung



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Angry Luke Skywalker, Beating, Blood and Gore, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Darth Vader isn't Luke's father, F/F, Gen, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Leia Organa should be her own warning tbh, Leia has reached the other end of Freud's madonna/whore spectrum, Leia isn't buying that for a minute, Major Character Injury, Past Rape/Non-con, and she's OK with that pretty much, because Jedi Are Bad And They Always Turn Evil, but he's repressing it, but he's still a Skywalker, fanfic writers in favor of letting Star Wars characters say "fuck", he's also very afraid of himself TBH
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 04:40:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30033180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nibelung/pseuds/Nibelung
Summary: Luke tries to train Leia, but in the wake of Darth Vader's revelation, his own doubts and fears get in the way.Leia isn’t having that for an instant. Consequences be damned.Another AU that escaped from my “profoundest hell” collection to gain something more like one-shot status. This one is set around the time of ROTJ.
Relationships: Leia Organa/Luke Skywalker
Kudos: 2





	o house of unquenchable fire

**Author's Note:**

> There might be something of a metatextual undertone to this one. I make no apologies.

“What’s wrong with you?!” Leia yelled, shutting off her lightsaber in frustration. “Luke, this is supposed to be a sparring match. That means _sparring_. Not cringing every time you turn that sword on. You’re barely even doing _anything_ with it. I don’t even know why you bothered offering to train me if you weren’t serious about it.”

Luke sighed. “Damn it, Leia—”

“Well, what **is** it? You said you’d teach me to fight like a Jedi. Help me build a lightsaber and everything. But now that I’ve done that, you’ve hardly taught me the first thing about how to use it. It’s like you’re not even _interested_. Force, Luke, ever since Kaaleita it’s like you’ve been scared of your own shadow.”

“Leia…” He took a deep breath, trying to figure out how to explain to her. “I can’t be the Rebel Jedi warrior you want me to be. I… I can’t use the Force anymore. I shouldn’t. It’s too dangerous.”

“Too **_dangerous_**?” She laughed, scornfully.

“Because… because of Vader. On Kaaleita, he—”

“So Vader injured you,” she said, gesturing to his metallic right arm. “Big deal, farmboy. Do you think other people haven’t been hurt? Do you think _I_ haven’t been hurt? I watched the Empire blow up my whole goddamn planet, remember! I had more stormtroopers than I have fingers take turns –"

“Leia!” An unaccustomed ring of iron entered his voice, and she fell silent. “It’s not that. It’s not… it’s worse than you think. Much worse.” He turned to face the windowless padded wall of the frigate’s gym, away from the accusation burning in her eyes.

“Haven’t you ever wondered why Vader didn’t kill me? He’d cut off my arm and my old saber was gone. I was utterly defenseless. If he’d wanted to he could’ve slain the Hero of the Alliance with one stroke.”

Now Leia was confused. “Because… because he wanted you to join the Dark Side. That’s what you told…”

“I didn’t tell High Command everything. I couldn’t dare. Leia… Vader isn’t just a Dark Lord; he isn’t just the man who killed my father. He was a Jedi.” Luke turned around again, his eyes meeting hers. “Zeno Skywalker. My brother.”

Leia let out an involuntary gasp.

“Your—? Really?”

“Yes.”

“Then… that’s why you don’t want to be a Jedi? Because he’s your brother?”

“It’s not that I don’t want to, Leia. I _can’t_. It’s too dangerous. Ben tried to warn me, but I didn’t realize what he meant, not until Vader. And I don’t think Ben really ever wanted to admit just how dangerous it is, maybe not even to himself.

“The Force… the more you use it, the more you get _used_ to it, the easier it becomes to Fall. It’s the force of nature itself. So powerful you could move planets with it, whole star systems, galaxies.

“And after a certain point… you start feeling invincible. Like you could fix all the problems of the galaxy if people just listened to your every whim. It’s why there were so many Jedi who joined the Sith when the Emperor came along. They’d gotten a taste of that power during the Clone Wars, and they didn’t want to give it up. Even when their hands were covered with blood.” Luke shook his head in disgust.

“When Vader told me he was my brother, I realized: he was right. Not about serving the Empire, but about how _tempting_ it was. To think you could rule everything yourself, be the sole judge of right and wrong. Because you have _power_.

“The Force isn’t something we can trust, Leia. It creates monsters.” With a dramatic flourish, he tossed the lightsaber hilt he was still holding to one corner of the gym. “I won’t overthrow the Emperor just to set somebody else up in his place. That goes against everything we’ve worked to accomplish.

“Leia, I believe in what we’re fighting for. That’s why I won’t risk letting the Force destroy it.”

He looked at her, expectant, evidently waiting for her to see the wisdom in what he was saying.

But Leia scoffed. “So you think when the galaxy needs you most, the best thing you can do is run away and hide? Stop teaching other people how to defend themselves, and just curl into a ball and die?”

“No! Leia, I still want to be a Rebel—”

“And the best way you can do that is by being a Jedi!” she spat back. “You have talent, Luke, and we need it working for us. In case you’ve forgotten, there are still multiple Sith Lords out there—”

“I haven’t forgotten.” He ran his droid hand through his tousled brown hair. “But we can’t fight the Force with the Force. That just leads to more Vaders. Believe me, Leia, it’s better this way.”

“Fine.” Leia’s face was dark with anger like a storm cloud. “Go tell High Command you’re done being a Jedi and you want to go back to being a fighter jockey. I’m sure they’ll be accommodating. We’re always short of pilots.

“But maybe you haven’t thought about what’s likely to happen after that. Have you, farmboy? You should.” The anger on her face was hardening to a sneer.

“Imagine it,” she said, stepping forward, forcing him back a pace. “A band of Sith Lords with nobody who can stand in their way. Nobody to stop them when they use their magic Force powers to read the minds of captured spies, and learn what they need to destroy the Alliance once and for all.”

“The High Command spending their last painful breaths gasping for air as the life is choked out of them.” Leia jabbed her finger into Luke’s chest for emphasis. “Han Solo’s head on a pike outside the Imperial palace.” Jab. “Chewbacca a throw rug in Emperor Pestage’s throne room.” Jab.

“Me, back in Vader’s deepest, darkest prison cell on Alderaan Base. No arms or legs or eyes. No hope of escape. Just a limbless sack of flesh with holes your _brother_ and his Sith friends can stick their shriveled gray cocks into whenever they feel like it.” Jab. Right over his heart.

“And all because our little Jedi wouldn’t lift a finger to stop the big bad Force wizards from doing whatever they liked. Because it was _dangerous_.” She had to restrain herself from decking him right there.

Instead she settled for folding her arms and turning around – but not without a trademark Leia Organa Parting Shot.

“You call yourself a Rebel? You make me fucking sick.”

A rookie mistake on her part: not facing your enemy when you’re taunting him.

It meant she was completely unprepared when the first punch came.

Luke had tried to tell her. Tried to explain why he no longer wanted to be a Jedi. Why it was a bad idea. Not just for him, but for the whole galaxy.

First, he’d had to tell her about Vader being his brother. Leia dealt with that pretty well, surprisingly. It emboldened him to go on.

But the rest of it… the _power_ the Force gave its wielders, power that all too often went to their heads, what that meant for a Rebellion trying to fight off the forces of tyranny… For one foolish moment he’d allowed himself to hope Leia would understand, would agree, would tell him back in better words what he was trying to say, with that politician’s silver tongue of hers.

But her furrowed brows made it clear she didn’t understand what he meant at all, and his heart sank.

And then she’d opened her mouth, and every word brought his blood closer to boiling.

Closer to lashing out. And proving his point in the worst possible way.

As Leia painted pictures with her words of bloody Sith triumphs, as her index finger stabbed at his soul, he wondered: how could she think that he would let any of those things happen? How could she imagine he’d want them to? Couldn’t she understand he was trying to _protect_ them – her and everyone else? Couldn’t she see what he was trying to save them _from_?

Maybe he should just show her, he thought; and then he tried to forget it had passed his mind at all.

_do it_ , the little voice at the back of his head said, _she’ll never understand any other way_

He ignored that voice. He wasn’t going to be like Vader. He wasn’t going to Fall, he wasn’t, _I’mnotI’mnotI’mnotI’mnot_ —

**_You make me fucking sick._ **

He was.

A bellow of rage was all the warning Leia got.

It wasn’t enough.

Rational thought had abandoned him, but for all Luke’s earlier protestations, his Jedi reflexes and tactical combat training were still fully in evidence.

He didn’t bother calling to his hand the lightsaber he’d tossed away with the Force; in his fury he started hitting Leia with fists alone.

Caught off guard by his Force-driven onslaught, she lost hold of her own sword-hilt; it tumbled from her nerveless fingers to the padded gym mats. Blow followed blow so quickly that Leia didn’t even have time to raise a hand to protect herself. So she just stood there, as motionless as a punching bag, absorbing Luke’s hits.

He concentrated his rage-fueled punches with terrible precision on her face.

His blood sang. He didn’t stop. The little voice at the back of his head was in full control. He barely saw what he was doing.

And she wasn’t even defending herself.

Lips split. Cartilage crunched. Teeth shattered.

Flesh and durasteel were covered in blood.

Leia fell backwards to the ground.

When his vision cleared and the anger ebbed away from his veins, Luke was confronted with the awful reality of what he’d done.

He wanted to vomit. He wanted to summon his lightsaber and throw himself on it. He wanted to jump out the nearest airlock. But he couldn’t bring himself to move from where he stood, next to Leia lying flat and motionless on the floor.

She was hurt. Because of his dark side. Because of his goddamn Force connection. Because of him.

He stood over her, shaking, fearful and ashamed. Staring at the face he loved. The face he’d ruined.

It was barely recognizable.

Her eyes were both swollen shut, plump and purple as jogan fruits. Her nose was bent to one side so that it almost touched one of her swollen eyelids. Her front teeth were gone.

Her tank top was spattered with copious blood, and the crotch of her sweatpants was soaked with her own urine. He’d beaten her so badly she’d pissed herself.

_No. No._

She was still breathing. But after this, he knew, he could never be around her again. Her or anyone else. He was a danger to them all. If they cut off his head with his own sword, it’d be no more than he deserved.

The little voice in his head, the one that whispered silkily to him of blood and fire in his darkest moments, had gone silent.

His legs were finally steadying and he stepped back, horrified, looking at the bloody hands that had done such an awful thing. Wondering if he could summon the nerve to Force-choke himself.

_I’m sorry, Leia, I’m sorry…_

A hoarse laugh croaked out from between swollen lips.

_What?_

“Knew you had it… in you… tharmboy.” It was Leia. She was still conscious, lisping her words through shattered teeth. “But next time… punth out thomebody… on the other thide.”

Was she… smiling?

He knelt beside her, relief flooding through him at seeing her awake and talking. Maybe he could help undo some of the damage he’d done, before they flung him into a jail cell. “Come on, Leia, let’s get you to the medbay—"

“No.” She shifted on the bloody gym mats, away from the hands he tried to extend under her. “Therves me… right… wanted you to… thow thome nerve. But didn’t expect… tho much… enthuthiathm. It’th what we need. We’re Rebelth… remember?”

Why wasn’t she angry at him? This was bizarre. “Leia, you need to—”

“Need you. Jedi. Wath worried… you didn’t want to thight any more.”

“Leia, I nearly ** _killed_** you!”

“Better’n… doing nothing.” Yes, she was definitely smiling at him. With her front teeth missing and lips twice their normal size. “But ‘m thtill here. Can’t… get rid of me that eathily.”

How could she still smile at him like that, after what he’d just done to her? He couldn’t fathom it.

“I’m sorry. This is all my fault; I shouldn’t have lost control…” he stammered, as he ran his flesh hand’s fingers through her hair. It pained him to notice how blood had spattered even in her soft yellow curls.

“Lithen, dammit!” Leia barked at him, and Luke felt himself compelled to gaze at her swollen lids, as if her eyes weren’t sealed beneath them.

“Bein’ Jedi… not thomething you can run from. Thtupid. Gotta put it… t’good use. Channel it. Otherwithe… y’get thtuff like thith.” She waved her arm limply to indicate her bloodied form. “Y’run away… won’t be jutht me that get’th their face beaten in. Wortht cathe thenario, it’th everyone in the galakthy.”

Leia grabbed hold of his durasteel arm and used it to pull herself to a sitting position. There wouldn’t be any taking her to the medbay, Luke realized, not till she’d said what was on her mind. And, truth be told, he was starting to wonder if Leia wasn’t right after all.

“Fact ith, th’only reathon I’m alive at all ith ‘cause of you an’ your Jedi thkills. I’d h’ve been dead if y’hadn’t thaved me on Kaaleita. You an’ that lather thword. B’lieve me, we’ve got enough bad guyth runnin’ around with thothe already. Need thome good oneth too.”

“You’re… you’re not angry with me?” Luke asked, still hardly believing his ears.

“C’mon. Why d’y’think I let you keep hittin’ me in th’firtht plathe?”

She was right, it dawned on him. She’d _let_ him hit her. Let him beat her to the Nine Hells. Because…

“Becauthe I’d rather have thomebody who hath a dark thide – and knowth it – thor a friend, than thomebody who runth away from their own talenth. Rather have a dangerouth Jedi th’n no Jedi at all.”

She was such a natural with the Force. Leia could hear his thoughts like they were a comm broadcast. And even after he’d turned her face to nerfburger, she was using that ability to give _him_ reassurance.

Maybe, just maybe, he thought, being a Jedi didn’t have to turn you into a monster.

“Y’re a good teacher when y’wanna be, Luke. But, theemth to me y’need thome …. pothitive reinforthement.”

“Then… you still…” Tears of relief blurred his view of her bloody, unseeing face, so at odds with the indomitable spirit beneath.

“Want. Yeth.” A wicked grin came to her split lips. ”Jedi. Training.” She pulled her tank top up to her chin. There wasn’t anything beneath. “You.”

Luke gulped.

Even now, even if he remained a Jedi, kept using his skills to help the Alliance… how could Leia want him, after what he’d done to her? How could she bear to be with such a monster?

She was still listening in to his thoughts.

“’Member Kaaleita? None of thothe bathtards ever gave a thecond thought ‘fore going ballth deep. You? I had to _work_ at it jutht to get you t’hit me, and I knew ‘xactly what buttonth to puth.” She raised her hand and wiped away a tear from his cheek, a tear she couldn’t even see.

Luke hadn’t even taught her about Force perception yet, and here she was, already doing it. Obi-Wan would have been proud.

“Y’re thtill th’good guy, Luke. Remember that. Vader or no Vader.” Leia tapped him on the breast with a finger, not hard this time but gently. “Even if y’let a pithed-off Printheth with a vibroblade f’r a tongue get your blood boiling once’n a while.” She pulled the blood-spattered tank top over her head, and flung it into the corner next to his lightsaber. “Tho thtop with the thelf-pity and jutht _fuck me already_.”

He leaned in closer, hardly daring to sully the warm, unmarked flesh of her breasts with his cold droid hand. “What about the medbay?”

“Medbay c’n wait. C’mon, tharmboy. Kith it better thor me.”

She put her mashed and swollen lips to his.

Soon she was giving Luke some instruction of her own.

Among other things, he learned that droid arms’ sensory mechanisms could provide surprisingly good tactile perception.

For her part, Leia’s training had advanced to the stage of learning to face down opponents while blindfolded. Though this particular variation of the exercise was unusual, because, as the Twi’leks might put it, the ideal result here was a mutual kill.

Naturally, Leia got full marks.


End file.
